Saturday, 1 February 2014

I Will Always Be In Love With Love

Well I do hope so. When I was younger, I used to hate it when people said "time heals all wounds". Even back then I remember thinking, only love can truly heal all wounds. If a person has love in their life they can conquer the world. I don't mean love as an isolated event limited to romanticism but to have love in one's life as the very gene that links everyone and everything together. Love means kindness and understanding and acceptance, gratitude, warmth, sympathy. But perhaps most importantly, love means trust and trust leads to friendship. And that's what this post is really about. Truly I can say that the most beautiful thing God has created in this world is friendship. Not just friendship between two friends but friendship between husband and wife, between parent and child, between sisters, between cousins, between teacher and student, between the old and young, man and beast. It's so beautiful. My whole life I've searched for the perfect friendship. And my whole life I've lived vainly thinking I'd found it. In the past, I'd be shattered when a friendship didn't turn out to be as lovely as I had imagined it to be. It was beyond my understanding how a friend could be something other than what I had imagined them to be. If we hit an obstacle I assumed our ability as friends to overcome said obstacle would show how much we valued our friendship. I will always fight for my friends. But this has never in my life been a reciprocated feeling. An obstacle hit has always meant a departed friend. I now feel very compliant with this reality. Friendship is too wonderful of a thing to waste on those who do not appreciate it enough to fight for it. Friendship will never become extinct nor will we ever outgrow it. If love is forever then friendship too is forever. Therefore I no longer fear an imperfect friendship because with every imperfection I feel somehow closer to that perfection.
I have many a times been told by my sister that I should care and love less passionately, that I get attached too quickly, that I am too expressive, too animated. She may very well be right and as such I have tried incessantly to correct my attitude but alas, to no avail. And so I have now adopted the words of Jane Austen, "There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature". I simply cannot change my nature no matter how many times it's proved destructive for me.  I've come to the conclusion that the Universe recognizes all my past efforts, accepts me as I am and will someday remunerate me. No one's work goes unnoticed, no matter how lousy it is. Not even Lulu's.

Until next time world...


Lulu xxo